Monday, August 30, 2021

Who Wants the 'D' (Battery)?

 The recent nonsense with the Mets' players making hand gestures to "boo" their own fans is really beyond disgraceful. It certainly made me wonder WWDPFD if this happened with a Phillie. I believe I would have 6-15 beers in the parking lot and then have a string of D batteries across my chest, just like Rambo had ammunition as I walked into Citizens Bank Park. These batteries would not be to power my transistor radio, but projectiles for the player who was a piece of shit and needed a knock on the head.

    I then thought about which Phillies through the years would have been a good candidate for DPF 'D' Battery Night and came up with these players who were pieces of shit:

1. Billy Wagner- He said Phillies fans suck and it it impossible to play here unless you never give up any runs ever. 

2. J.D. Drew- This piece of trash sat out a year and played Independent ball with the St. Paul Saints to avoid being a Phillie. 

3. Scott Rolen - Begging to leave Philly and then calling St. Louis "Baseball Heaven" was something to raise our ire...forever.

4. Sean Rodriguez - This numbnuts actually said "Who's looking bad and feeling entitled when you hear stuff like that? I'm not the one booing. I'm not the one screaming. I'm not the one saying pretty disgusting things at times. That seems pretty entitled. You're just making yourself look pretty bad as an individual, as a person, as a fan." I, for one, do not think that yelling that he was a man-bunned pig-fucking asshat being an issue.

5. Adam Eaton - This squid was upset he was booed when he received his undeserved 2008 World Series ring. Well, Adam, maybe don't have a 6.50 lifetime ERA buddy.

Maybe this spawns a new DPF T-Shirt idea. Who Wants the 'D' (Battery)?